Empathy, care, compassion and goodness are the hallmarks of caregivers. Roselyn Carter once said, “In your lifetime, you either will need care or you will become a caregiver”. There is an estimated 50 million caregivers in the United States caring for an elderly, disabled or chronically ill loved one. This care sometimes requires superhuman strength and patience.
There are times however, when it becomes very difficult for the caregiver. In addition to meeting the needs of the patient/client, the caregiver is vulnerable to taking on the pain of the person in need. Its hard to talk about it as they never want to bring about more pain for the person already suffering. Keeping these feelings inside brings about exhaustion and even depression. Some have called this “compassion fatigue”.
Many doctors and nurses suffer from this fatigue and it is a real difficulty for home health givers and family members. It is stated that “compassion fatigue” results from taking on the emotional burden of a patient’s agony. It includes irritability, disturbed sleep, outbursts of anger and emotional withdrawal.
For the many ordinary people who become caregivers, the most important way to prevent or treat “compassion fatigue”, is to first of all admit that it is happening. It is giving yourself permission to admit when pain and suffering is getting to you. It is important to realize and accept that nothing is wrong with the caregiver. They are not inept nor weak nor inadequate in any way. It is simply overwhelming at times and one needs a break.
If you or someone you know is caring for someone, here are some helpful guidelines:
1. Take some time each day to be quiet (perhaps when the care receiver is sleeping) and be quiet with yourself – reminding yourself why you are doing what you are doing. Why is caregiving important to you?
2. Write – just a few minutes a day on why you appreciate yourself for doing what you do.
3. Pray or meditate. Research shows that it decreases agitation & depression.
4. Stay connected to the outside world. Make a phone call, send a note or e-mail, see someone outside the caregiving at least once a week.
5. Exercise. Walk – even a walk to and around a shopping mall will help.
6. Ask for help.
Know when caregiving is spreading compassion and care and know when you yourself need care for yourself. We can all give care and chances are, someday we will need care ourselves.
SINCE WE ALL STUMBLE FROM TIME TO TIME, ITS BEST IF WE CAN HOLD HANDS…….
Tags: Anger outbursts, Caregivers, Compassion fatigue, Disturbed sleep, Emotional Withdrawal, Empathy-Care-Compassion, Roselyn Carter, Strength & patience